The Birth of the Universe... according to Max and Maggie.

The more they know, the funnier they are. Max, while shoving rice-crispy treats into his mouth and I doing the dishes, started to explain to me the Big Bang theory. He has it down pretty well. Go Mrs. Oz (his second grade teacher)!!!! Then he indulged me in his own theory which he has titled the Big Crush theory. It goes something like everything was one big pile of matter. It became crushed under the force of gravity and it ended up in what we now know as the universe. So impressed with himself, he began seeking support for his new theory starting with me. Then solicited Maggie's vote. She listened to the comparison of each theory and then promptly and matter-of-factly said, "All I know is that all the planets move around the sun. The only planet that has life is earth. The other planets don't have people on them." Go Miss Eschler (her kindergarten teacher)!!!! Max disagreed... "What about Mars? You know there are signs of life past and maybe even present on Mars!!!!" Wow! Wish I could suck up as much information and spit it back like they can! And, who taught Max how to talk? Would you ever believe he was speech and language delayed as a toddler????

Teeth Keep Falling Out!

OK, we have been doing this for, let me do the math, since Bo was 6 that is 13 years and we probably have at least 4 more years to go till the Toothfairy can retired. Does the Toothfairy assigned to your house ever get so busy she forgets to stop in? Well the Reier's fairy does quite frequently I am embarassed and sad to acknowledge. Sneaky and forgetful as she may be, however, so far, so good. That is until the latest missing tooth. Skeptical Hannah checked promptly (hoping to gather proof for either believing or accusing) to see if the Toothfairy had delivered. Nope. Nothing. And Hannah, again promptly, shared the situation. So, when she was encouraged to check again, viola! The Toothfairy had indeed followed through with a dollar. (You know the economy these days... teeth don't pay so well especially when the Toothfairy doesn't plan ahead.) Hannah, relieved that she could still believe, raced in to show off the evidence supporting the existence of the Toothfairy. She snapped that dollar bill open and out fell a receipt. Apparently, not only is there a toothfairy, but she dines out for lunch and Chan Chun for Chinese!!!!

Kids Say the Dardest Things!

Some of these were first hand conversations I was witness to. Others have been reported recently from those privy to the conversation.

John, Jake's dad, asked me yesterday if we have been living in a tent. Then he told me what Max had said to Daphne, " You guys are so lucky you live in a house!" Max was standing next to me and I looked at him with a "WHAT?" Max shrugged his shoulders and said, "Well, I couldn't think of anything else to say. It was the first time in my life I couldn't think of anything to say!" I agree, that must have been the first time and probably the last!

Zeke likes to play. Chewie not so much. Zeke wants to play. Chewie yaps at him to stop. Zeke thinks it is great fun and keeps pestering Chewie. You get it. My strategy so that I don't call the pound is to squirt them with a stream of water from my stash of super-duper-stop-that-now squirt bottles. Matt and I had just walked in the house from Florida. Maggie greeted us with a full on-the-floor-kick-and-scream tantrum. I picked up the nearest squirt bottle and gave it to her good. She stopped... just like the dogs...go figure! But then she stood up and with her hands on her hips informed me, "YOU CAN'T DO THAT. THAT IS ILLEGAL!!!!" With that, she stomped off to her room.

Oregon Coast Vacation June 2009

The Reier Circus (minus Bo) spent a week in Arch Cape, Oregon. We rented a house on the beach. Arrived with no agenda and made up the vacation as we went.Tom came to dinner on Friday night. Weird having a neighbor come to dinner while you are on vacation. We served burgers. We waited for him to leave before we ate the "real" food on Saturday night.

Maggie's toe after playing with a Dunengous crab. They are delicious by the way!

Check out the "meaty" starfish!

During one of the sand castle building afternoons, Maggie was spotted making a "sand angel". Ya, gettin' sand out of her hair took more than a few showers and baths!

Everyone did well with the long drive. Everyone that is until the last 3 hours home when Maggie totally came apart and started poking and kicking everyone within her reach. We read the first two Fablehaven books and watched some fabulous old movies... Operation Pettycoat.

Adding to the Reier Children's List of Grievances...

Matt took the kids to buy pumpkin plants today.  The instructions were given, "Set the plants on the front porch until we plant them in the grow boxes.  Zeke will get into them if you leave them on the patio."  Maggie's ended up in the family room... HELLO?????   Anyhow, when said father discovered the mess (because Max had the vacuum out cleaning in an effort to protect his kid-sister) Matt scolded Maggie and told her she had to clean up the mess.  She stomped out of the house, "We are not supposed to be treated like slaves!"

So, we crush their "Happy Birthday Spirits" and we "treat them like slaves".   Wait, not ME!  Those accusations were both directed at their father!!!! Whewwww.  Safe again.

Ooops.

I forgot the funniest thing that happened at the MTC...  Scroll back down to the photo of the kids and I with Bo.  Look closely at the object in Max's hand.  Now for the background.  Easter was three days before.  Grandma Reier puts on an Easter Egg hunt like none other.  It really is more like a festival of toys and treats... literally, the Easter Bunny hides "stuff" (not just eggs, in fact mostly stuff that doesn't even fit in an egg!) until all hiding places are occupied and then the bunny keeps going.  Get the idea?  Well one of the many items was a battery operated fan that was also filled with Easter-themed candy.  Yes, every kid ended up with, like, ten of them.  When Max started to cry, he whipped out his "fan" which was fully operable.  Stuck it right up to his face and said, "No problem.  I'll just dry my tears."  Later, I found myself the recipient of such service.  WHERE DID THIS KID COME FROM?    Oh yes, I forget...Kid Planet.

Max's 8th Birthday

OK.  Why do my kids like Chuck-a-Rama???  Chuck-a- something!  But they sure do.  Hey, I cook quite a bit, so it isn't that they don't get good home cookin'.  Anyhow, we spent the evening out at you guessed it.  On the way home, we had three meltdowns that occurred in rapid secession.   First Maggie (not sure what got her going), then Hannah, and lastly Max.  It was pretty darn funny!  So, I decided to document the event with audio and video. Listen carefully to the first clip. I say, "What did Dad do?" to Max.  Max replies, "He crushed my happy birthday spirit!"

  

Missionary Prepping

... with Grandma and Grandpa Reier.

Then... we had to have a big party to celebrate Bo's new adventure. I wasn't sure where all the people came from. Do you thing there is such thing as "farewell groupies" for prospective missionaries????
Just a few days left!
Jill Winegar!!!!! We love Jill. (I think Bo kinda likes her too?!?!)
Last time Blake and Amy Walker were at our house, Blake was dressed like a woman... a scary woman! Then he showed up and expected us to believe he was respectable?????

Humm, these friends weren't hired. Bo must have thought these friends wouldn't be scared away by us, and apparently they weren't! They actually frequented our home on occasion.
Brooke and Jason (Bishop Lambert that is..) and cute Finn. Better than just good friends!

Mom, Is there REALLY an Easter Bunny?

To start off, we schedule the Easter Bunny to come on the Friday night before Easter Sunday. So, yesterday Max asked me if there really was an Easter Bunny because, as he sees it, it really could be the mom and dad.  My reply was something to the effect of, "Do you really think I would buy you all that crap to eat and make a mess with?"  He didn't have to think about it very long before he replied, "No, but Dad would."  Then walked out of the kitchen to carry on with his Indiana Jones activities.

So, when I was leaving for my run this morning, there was a note on the door that someone left in the middle of the night (I know it was really late because I was up with the dogs and Bo and Jill were in and out till who-knows-when).  The note indicated that there were eggs hidden in the front yard.  Matt let the kids hunt the eggs while I was gone.  After the eggs had been located, Max brought up the existence of the Easter Bunny again.  It went something like this:

Max:  I believe it is a possibility that you could be the Easter Bunny.  Not Mom, but maybe you.

Matt:  (Had nothing to say at this point.)

Max:  But then, I think I found some bunny fur on one of my eggs.

Then he left in his usual matter-of-fact way having asked and answered his own question.

Black and Blue

Here are some "progression"  photos of Maggie's head injury.  When I got home last night, both of her eyes had a hint of blue to them... the shiner-kind of blue.  This morning, yep, two black eyes filling in quick!  When I told her we needed to take a photo, she didn't want to because she said she would be embarrassed.  When I told her we would put them on our blog, she was all about getting the photo shoot done!  Silly girl.

Max's Taxes

The setting: Matt at his desk and computer doing taxes on the morning of March 28, 2009.
Max enters the study. Seats himself on a nearby chair. "Whatcha doin' Dad?"
Matt turns to Max: "I'm just doing taxes."
Max: "Are you going to watch 'Chuck' while you work?"
Matt: "No, I think I'll need to concentrate here."
Max: "Well, can I watch you do taxes?'
Matt: "Yeah, but it is pretty boring."
Max: "That is OK. I have to do lots of boring things. Besides, I should watch because someday I'll be grown up and have to do taxes."

Epilogue: Max didn't last very long. Perhaps he is a quick study.

Max Got Stuck

Matt was busy in the study finishing up taxes. I was a busy baker in the kitchen. Max, Hannah, and Maggie had decided that they would help each other clean their rooms rather than clean their own room's by themselves. The incentive: when rooms are done, frost cookies for Bo's "farewell" tomorrow. Great idea huh?!?!?! Maggie's room.... done without a hitch. Hannah's room was next. It wasn't long before Maggie emerged, panic stricken just as Matt barrels up the stairs. "Max is stuck!" Well, we dashed as only panicked parents can to find just what you see above. It was so funny that I sent Matt for the camera. While Matt was running for the camera, Maggie was comforting Max with hugs and soothing words "It's OK Max, we'll save you!" and to me she said, "THIS IS NOT FUNNY!" Being that Max wasn't in any imminent danger, Matt forced Max to smile and say "cheese" before he would rescue him.

A Trip to Logan...

On February 7, 2009, Bo went through the Logan temple with his bestest friend... Nathan Thomson. The Thomson family members are some of our closest friends. The Mechams and the Workmans (Judd's parents) along with Tiffany and Tom Christenson joined us for dinner. It was amazing to be with some of our most favorite people on that incredible night. Bo and Nathan received their mission calls on the same day too!

Ron Mecham up to his usual antics!

Patiently ignoring the 40-something year old boys.

Talee and Stefanie... Bo's other two mom's. (I'll get you his SS# number so you can claim him.)

Tom and Tiffany, just shortly before Tom gets out of yet another speeding ticket.

Bo, Judd, and Nate. What hotties ( I mean handsome young men)!

...With a bump on the head.

Yes, a real GOOSE EGG, well almost. It is at least a grade AAA chicken egg! Maggie (under the careful and never fleeting watch of her father) had an incident with the pantry door. I'm still not sure what happened. But, we have progression photos. On Friday, you could have held an egg up to her head and her forehead was the same size. On Saturday, the swelling had gone down just a bit, but the colors were vibrant!

Maximus!!!

When I picked the kids up from school today, Max was the first one in the car. As he was climbing in he announced, "Mom, I am really sorry, but I forgot to not be disrespectful in class. I am on blue!" (They have to pull colored cards for rule infractions in class. One rule is the speak respectfully to all students and teachers.) I just laughed and laughed at the "I forgot to not..."

Last night, Hannah thought she was so clever. She challenged her dad to say "Sally shot the city sheriff" five times in a row as fast as he could. (If you know Matt, no tricks necessary to get him to say that one word... come on... you know what it is!!!) So, Matt asked her where she heard that. She indicated that the sweet boys at school in math shared it with her. Matt's reply, "See, that is why I never want you to hang out with boys!" Ok, so this is where Max comes in. "I can say it! Let me say it. I shot the shi**y sheriff. I said it. Did you hear that? I did it!" Matt: "No, Max you didn't." Max: "Yes I did it. Listen. I shot the shi**y sheriff." Matt: "No Max." Max: "I shot the shi**y sheriff. See I can do it!" Matt: "Max, you have to stop." Max: "All I said was 'pity'.

It has been a LONG time!!

Well, I just realized we are nearing a two month mark for no blogging. I have been completely inundated with work, school and family... in that order.

We are now just four weeks away from getting Bo out the door. Caiti is leaving in August for a year. She has been accepted to be an exchange student with Rotary (the same program I was with). She'll be living in Brazil, just south of the Amazon! WHEWWWW! I am just as excited for her as I was for myself when I went on exchange. Caiti initiated the idea. Matt and I just stood back, watched, signed papers, and wrote out a check. She is paying for 1/2 of the excursion. So, call her to baby-sit and you can be part of the adventuret as well!!!

It is amazing, but I will only have her in my house as my charge for 5 more months. She'll be gone until the following July and then she'll be off to school. At this point she is thinking USU. Maybe she'll decide to do a nursing program here in SLC and live with me a little longer. I would like that since she has only liked me for the last 2 years. Or pretended to like me for the last two years!!!

I need to scuttle off to Brigham City to see a teacher. I am still planning to update with photos and great Max-tales as soon as I get all of my grading done and a first draft of the first draft of the first draft of the first draft of a literature review done!

Update on the X-rated

Ok, I should actually be finishing my work, but my brain has ceased to function at this late hour and the puppy is just too much fun to watch... I know, I have to get some photos up of the little guy. We are all in LOVE!!! Anyhow, you all should be able to tell just how tired I am by the babbling that has nothing to do with the title of this post. But, I really do have something to say that may make you all smile. You see, Max apparently doesn't realize the "Bull ShihTs" joke (reference the X rated post down the page a ways). When we were at Grandma Reier's last Sunday, she told Grandpa that she wanted a puppy for her 60th birthday. Max piped up, "Grandma! You should get a Bull ShihTs." I whipped around to see the Max's very serious face as he very rationally explained to his grandmother about the breed of dog she should consider adopting. Dead serious he was!!! What ever will I do with that kid? He is just too entertaining!!!! Oh oh, Zeke has eaten something. What could it be? It doesn't sound good!

X-Rated Part II

Matt and I took Hannah and Max and their cousin Tessa to the Body Worlds exhibit on Saturday. About half way through the exhibit Max blurts out, (reminding you just how quiet he is...not) "I've got it! I know how they do this. Flesh eating beetles!" Needless to say, his epiphany stopped more than a few people in their tracks.

As we exited the exhibit, the kids were able to participate in some activities and get a small sketch book. I stopped at a bakery on the way home. The three kids stayed in the car while I went in to the bakery. When I returned, the two girls immediately began to tattle on Max. "He is drawing naughty pictures in his book". "He is disrespecting the Statue of Liberty." I took his book and checked out the art work. He had drawn a picture of one of the displays, a body carrying an Olympic torch. It looked just like the display! Initially, I didn't realize this was the case. I told him we shouldn't draw pictures like that. Then, five minutes later I saw a Body Worlds sign and it hit me... where had I just taken him?! Yes, I know. I am a bit slow. That explained the look he gave me when I said "We don't draw pictures like that, Max." His look was, "What are you talking about? Do you remember where we just spent two hours????" Again, slow, I know. Wish I could show you the art work... it was great!

X-Rated

Max: Mom and Dad, what do you call a dog that is part Shih Tzu and part Bulldog?

Mom and Dad (half listening): I don't know, what?

Max: a "Bull Shiht"

Mom and Dad (now listening intently): a what???

Max (nonchalantly walking out of the kitchen): I said a "Bull Shiht"

Mom and Dad (now on the floor): Where did you hear that?

Max (very matter-of-fact): the babysitter.

Mom: Oh, that must be Hayden.

Yah! Thanks Hayden. You owe me a night of sitting for nuttin'!!!!!! And, if he tells it to anyone at church, at school, or on the street, you'll need to pay me to let you babysit!!!

"I Hope They Call Me on a Mission"

It is here! Bo has been called to serve in the Washington Spokane Mission. I teased him that he was going to go to Boise, Idaho (not that there is anything particularly wrong with Boise, but it is just really close to home). He almost made it! The southern boundary of his mission is just north of Boise! Hah! Hah!

To make it all extra fun and exciting, Nathan Thomson, Bo's very dear friend from Logan (they have been friend since they were 5 years old) got his call the same day to Argentina! We hip, hip, hoorayed over the phones together.

The only problem with all this mission stuff is that a missionary has to be at least 19 years old. Last time I checked, I was still 25, which would make Bo just a toddler. What happened and when did it happen?????

The Recitals

The first recital of the holiday season was our piano recital. Both Max and Hannah played beautifully. They both had their pieces memorized, but at the last minute chickened out and took their music up with them, although neither one looked at it. Max played both his pieces at least one octave higher because "it sounds so much better". I cried... sobbed actually. I wish I could share what a feat it was for Max. He doesn't even realize what an endeavor it was to be able to play the piano with both hands. I wish I had video of his "tricky" hand on the first day he ever practiced a tune to compare to the day he played his recital pieces. I told him one day how exciting it was that he was playing so well with his tricky hand and how proud I was of him for his hard work. He replied, "Yah, my tricky hand has always wanted to play the piano." And then he continued to practice.


Hannah is really starting to enjoy the piano. She allows herself to get so frustrated so fast. But I think we have established a good routine of practice with reasonable expectations...finally!!! I only have to nag maybe twice a week to get the practicing done.

The second recital was Tiffany Dance Co. Christmas production on December 18, 2008. Maggie is my only dancer this year! She loves it more than life itself! She dances and sings all day when she is at home. We have saved all of the wonderful dance costumes over the past few years. After performances are finished, the costumes go into the dress up trunk and make new debut often. Maggie's dance was called "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas". It was a bit of a challenge to decide which images to include. Matt took 95!! When I flipped through all of the images in LightRoom, it was like watching the dance again!

I've Been Dreaming of a White Christmas, Just Like the... WHAT???

We arrived home from Venice just in time. Ten minutes later the snow hit hard! We snuggled into bed for a long winter's nap (yah, right we did). We awoke to a beautiful white Christmas. But now it is January 1, 2009. Christmas is over. Let's get that snow melted, thaw out our piggy toes and get some tulips popping up!

Matt, the great giant of a man that he his, made sure everyone's day was just right. He shoveled out a trail to the latrine for Chewie and her new little brother Zeke at least 4 times Christmas day.